I remember everything. The good, the bad. The fights late at night or before school, the kisses we blew to each other in the hall, every game of Monopoly I played to make her happy, when she turned on the playstation so I could sleep, everytime she set up the hookah, and every time I cleaned it. When I called her a hypocrite, when she told me she didn’t love me anymore. When she first told me she loved me, and when I called her and made her say it. I remember when we were both so unhappy. When we were crazy about each other. Everything.
I don’t know why I miss her so much. I haven’t seen or talked to her in months. I don’t really know what I’m holding onto; my love for her, or the heartache she left me with. I want to talk to her, to tell her that I miss her and that it’s not impossible to be happy with her. I’m not gunna lie, I want her back in my life, but I know that she’s happy (well, hopefully), and I just want her back for my own selfish reasons.
Why do I even post these things? I guess I just hope that she still remembers my exsitence and maybe checks on these every once in a while… but I doubt it.
I give this heartache 4 more months. If it’s gone, then I’m sure I’ll be fine. If it’s still here… then I don’t know.
Periwinkle misses her skuzzlebutt. </3
